Thinking of Peace of Mind

I know a man who didn’t do much thinking in life. Though he was kind and selfless, he did no strategic scheming. Nobody knew how he was going to end up. So, every step of the way people feared the worst for him. Men who chased women offered him thoughts on getting laid. Money lovers shared clever ideas on getting rich. Career advisors sat him down and described the most promising job opportunities. Social animals suggested mind expanding substances that would open up new worlds for him. Athletic types tutored him on the best ways to keep vigorous and healthy. Meanwhile, older relatives told him he should think about finding a wife, settling down and starting a family.

Yet the understanding old men in a park had better thoughts. One afternoon, one of these men told the fellow that the most important thing at any stage of life was peace of mind. The thoughtless man smiled and said, “You know what? I never thought of that!”

But from that day forward he determined that peace of mind was something worth looking into. Still, being who he was he often didn’t give it much thought. So. The results came about effortlessly. But it took time. As events unfolded, the man noticed that one after the other, people who once advised him were reaping tragic results from their thoughtful ways of navigating humanity. From now on let’s refer to our thoughtless friend as ‘Mike.’

One man who valued sex had told Mike, “You have to think like a woman thinks. So you’ll know what she’s going to do next. Then you can watch her make her own bed. And not only will she have to lay in it, but you’ll be lying in it with her! Think about it!” So, Mike kept his eye on the man. Simply to see if his life choices brought him peace of mind. Negative. One woman in the man’s life discovered the existence of another, vice versa, and the two joined forces to string the man along. This ultimately led to a motel room where he was beaten to within an inch of his scheming life by one woman’s ‘baby daddy.’ It seemed he made his own bed. He had to lay in it.

Mike decided a similar outcome for him probably wouldn’t bring peace of mind. So, he avoided the womanizer. Now not only did the silly dude nearly lose his life. He also lost the asset of a friend with better instincts.

Days later, Mike bumped into an associate who recently purchased a diamond encrusted Rolex. This man once advised him on putting himself first, getting rich quick and ignoring the world and its poor. They were all suckers, he said. Just to show off, he offered Mike a ride home in his new Cadillac. The jewels around his neck and wrists were highly visible. The sun caused them to sparkle like stars as he cruised through a modest section of New York City. This vainglorious man chuckled with pride all the way. But later that night in the same section, the self-satisfied schemer entered a store for cigarettes. When he came outside some desperate poor people used the opportunity to club him over the head with a garbage can and repossess his wallet and jewelry. When Mike got word of this, he decided riches couldn’t bring him any lasting peace of mind either. It seemed to him that, to say the least, a cynical philosophy had compromised his advisors’ joy. To say the least.

Next up he ran into the dude who had those precious thoughts to share on health and vitality. The dude had a major potbelly now. He blamed it on too many protein shakes which he still thought were healthy options.

Mike visited with his older relatives next. These men had many thoughts concerning marriage, household, and family. But all negated their obligations to their own serenity. They were now relegated to a life of social ‘security’ which meant the old ball and chain and the foolish mandate, ‘happy wife - happy life’. This introduced consumption-heavy, ungrateful children who would grow to quietly despise them, ignore their advice and repeat their All-American mistakes.

Mike reflected on the failures of these men. Like many, most were deceived by the seemingly innocent human capacity for thought. So, he smiled to himself, grateful for having never been much of a thinker.

One afternoon he sat chatting with the same old man who had argued for peace of mind. He told the wise man of what had befallen his friends and family. The old man laughed until he couldn’t laugh anymore. Then a luxurious vehicle parked nearby. An attractive woman emerged from the car and came into the park for some quiet time. Sitting nearby, she overheard Mike telling the old man about the motel incident. She couldn’t help blushing. She had heard the same story from her best friend. More than once. Her best friend was in fact one of the women involved in the incident.

This woman in the park had been jaded by an ex-boyfriend. Hearing the motel story from her friend, she was eager to fish out a foolish man and treat him badly according to any mistaken assumptions he might have about women. That would be her way of getting even with mankind. Yet, overhearing Mike’s take on the happenings, her malicious intent expired. Listening closely, she realized that there were men like Mike who didn’t put much thought into scheming. It was refreshing.

After sending him a friendly grin, she and Mike hit it off. She found him safe, unassuming, mature and secure. All of this pointed to a kind of confidence that spoke of natural self-mastery. I’m not suggesting that all quality relationships start out this way. Nor am I saying that every person in the same situation would be equally impressed with one another as were these two. Yet thankfully for Mike there was a sweet ending to his famous ‘thoughtlessness’.

Smiling at the pair, the old man kept his satisfaction to himself (a prudent man conceals knowledge). Soon after, the old man walked home on his cane with pleasant ideas. Meanwhile Mike and company spoke in the quiet, measured tones of people unsullied by egotism, arrogance and counterfeit claims. So, after long, roundabout journeys, the two had rediscovered and reinforced the wisdom and serenity in themselves. They became life partners and proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that happiness is increased when it’s shared.

If there’s anything to take away from this post it could be as follows: Nobody can think himself into peace of mind. Among other things, thinking is typically a creative enterprise exercising the muscles of moral consideration and problem solving. So, as it solves one problem it creates another. But peace of mind is another proposition. Serenity is effortless. It is a state of well-being. It has a magnetism and charm all its own which attracts sound reasoning and a pleasant life experience. It is the jewel in the crown of positive mental health. Try it on for size. But try not to overthink it.

If peace of mind is the furthest thing from your mind you can talk to someone by calling the Mental Health Hotline at 866-903-3787. Or if you feel like a danger to yourself call 988.